The List of Caregiving Fatigues Grows

So much wears us out.

In 2017, one of my training program participants shared that her mom just couldn’t cope, that even very small changes caused her a great deal of stress.

I thought: “I don’t think it’s that she can’t cope. I think she’s coped out.”

Her mom had experienced intense losses in a short time: The death of her husband, the addition of hired help in the home and her own significant health declines. It struck me that her mom was simply wearing from coping with so much.

That insight led me to re-think the term “compassion fatigue.” I began to think of it as an umbrella term. In order to feel better, we need to get specific about our weariness so we can add a specific solution right for that fatigue.

I added insights about our Caregiving Fatigues in my training programs and regularly engage in conversations with family caregivers about their weariness.

Just when I think I had thought of most of them, I realize there’s so many more. I connected with participants in the Certified Caregiving Consultant training program this past week and led a discussion about The Caregiving Fatigues. I shared some of them:

• Bad luck fatigue

• Cooperation fatigue

• Coping fatigue

• Discouragement fatigue

• Grace fatigue

• Grief fatigue

• Guilt fatigue

• Support fatigue

I then asked, “What would you add to the list?”

Here’s what we added:

• Advocacy fatigue: Fighting the battles without ever feeling like you gain a win.

• Replay fatigue: Rerunning what happened in your mind and beating yourself up for not doing more or less or enough.

• Repeat fatigue: Constantly sharing the caree’s medical history to health care professionals, colleagues and acquaintances who ask, “What’s wrong with your (insert relationship)?”

• Requalification fatigue: Completing paperwork over and over to continue to receive benefits through a program.

• Scarcity fatigue: There’s just not enough time, resources, support, help and money.

• Training fatigue: Training the constant revolving door of home health aides and other providers.

No wonder our caregiving experience burns us out.

What would you add to our list?

(Image by Katzen Rodroi Tupas from Pixabay.)

Resources

• Take our Compassion Fatigue survey and tell us what wears you out.

• Check out Healing Words, my book which helps you heal your Caregiving Fatigues.

• We have a series of webinar that help you heal your Caregiving Fatigues.

• Our next Caregiving Listener Project will happen on March 22. Learn how you can provide support as a Volunteer Listener or receive support as a Story Teller.

• Join us in Chicago on May 15, 16 and 17 to Heal, Receive and Plan. Early-bird registration rate ends March 10.

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