During The Caring Conference on Friday, March 25, Jessica Sima shared how she overcame burn-out as she cares for her mom and her brother, works a full-time job and parents her two kids. As she discussed her process of healing her burn-out, she talked about the suggestions we often hear: Take a bubble bath. Get a manicure. Jessica understood these suggestions to be well-meaning but she needed a reason to implement these ideas. What problem does the bubble bath or manicure solve?
I often think that others want us to take these quick fixes because the quick fixes make them feel better. If the weekly manicure cures our burn-out and overwhelm, then well-meaning friends may feel better because they feel off the hook. Phew, they may think, now they’re better so we don’t have to hear about their difficult days.
It’s so hard for others to see us in situations that create a steady stream of stress. It’s draining to be with us through an extended difficult situation. That’s caregiving. It feels like the bad luck, the terrible declines and the heartbreaking decisions will last forever. We stay with it. It can be really challenging for others to stay with us through it.
When we consider what helps us during our situation, we can consider the quick fixes. Then we choose the meaningful option. We need a solution that brings meaning to us, that reminds us that we can have a life during a life of caregiving. A meaningful solution could be that manicure. It also could be taking on a tough project at work.
So much feels decided for us during caregiving. When it comes to how we cure our burn-out, we get to decide what brings us meaning. We don’t have to take the quick fix to help another feel better about our situation.
What brings meaning to your day?
(Image by Bruno /Germany from Pixabay.)
Resources
Our free courses on Caring Our Way, our community on Mighty Networks, includes The Daily Healing Plan and They Daily Recovery Plan. Our plans can bring meaning to your days.
Our solution for caregiving support, The Caregiving Department, is free! Take our assessments, ask Certified Caregiving Consultants for help and support, join our monthly planning meetings. Join us in The Caregiving Department, part of CaringOurWay.
We’ve scheduled our first Virtual Caregiving Town Hall meetings. We’d love for you to host a Virtual Caregiving Town Hall for family caregivers in your community. Join our Caring Advocacy and Awareness group on CaringOurWay.com to learn more.