I really appreciate the way you recognize that we are more than just how well our career is or is not doing, how even if we have no doubt this is the right choice for us, it’s still so so hard. Thank you.
Yes! I'm always astounded that so many see us an extension of our caree rather than a separate individual sharing an experience with our caree. What helps our caree definitely may help us. But what helps us is often different than what helps our caree.
I hear your frustration and was nodding furiously, Denise.
This:
'As assessment that uses us to assess the caree adds to our frustration. That kind of transactional experience just adds to our weariness. It’s also traumatic to be told we are completing a caregiver assessment only to just report on our caree in order to determine if our caree qualifies for services. What about services to help us? We need more than a respite program, which sometimes just isn’t logical or feasible for us to use.'
I'm linking to your 17 Caregiver Systems in my article tomorrow - I hope this will raise greater awareness of ALL the interfaces caregivers deal with, in addition to doing hands-on caring and trying to curate quality moments for their loved one. (The UK system is different but these issues are mirrored here!)
Thank you so much, Victoria! I like how you explain this -- the systems within a country may be different but are mirrors. We all have different family systems, for instance, but that system may challenge us. It's so important that professionals understand the system categories while also have the insight that our interactions and challenges within the systems will differ.
I really appreciate the way you recognize that we are more than just how well our career is or is not doing, how even if we have no doubt this is the right choice for us, it’s still so so hard. Thank you.
Yes! I'm always astounded that so many see us an extension of our caree rather than a separate individual sharing an experience with our caree. What helps our caree definitely may help us. But what helps us is often different than what helps our caree.
Caree, autocorrect. 🙂
Happens all the time!!
I hear your frustration and was nodding furiously, Denise.
This:
'As assessment that uses us to assess the caree adds to our frustration. That kind of transactional experience just adds to our weariness. It’s also traumatic to be told we are completing a caregiver assessment only to just report on our caree in order to determine if our caree qualifies for services. What about services to help us? We need more than a respite program, which sometimes just isn’t logical or feasible for us to use.'
I'm linking to your 17 Caregiver Systems in my article tomorrow - I hope this will raise greater awareness of ALL the interfaces caregivers deal with, in addition to doing hands-on caring and trying to curate quality moments for their loved one. (The UK system is different but these issues are mirrored here!)
Thank you so much, Victoria! I like how you explain this -- the systems within a country may be different but are mirrors. We all have different family systems, for instance, but that system may challenge us. It's so important that professionals understand the system categories while also have the insight that our interactions and challenges within the systems will differ.
From what I gather from other carers here in the UK, there is what's said and written and what actually happens or is available is very different. If you ever want to get discombobulated and learn about it: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6Bkrxs4X3vj0UNnYbMahWu?si=796b0fbfa522489e
This is probably the most articulate explanation of why things don't work well here.